orange juice

you think that you life is going well when all of a sudden it changes in a blink of an eye and you cant stop it. the other day my mom told me that i had lost the spark that i used to have. she said how i'm no longer the girl full of joy that was always happy. she said i was defensive and saw the negative in the night. we both knew why. i talked to my best friend and she could point out why i wasn't happy but no one can do a thing about it. all anyone can say is that's what happens when you grow up: this change and people move. that speaks to me that the spark that was there will never be there again so i better go look for a new one. it's not what i want but it's what is truth. no room for slant truth in this situation. last year should have been the worst year of my life but it wasn't. i would live it over again in a heart beat. i knew who my friends were and i knew they would be there for me under any circumstance but now i don't know. i don't know anything. no, i know two things. i know that my life is changing and i'm growing up and there is nothing i can do to stop it and i know that God is the only one that truly is there for me under any circumstance. i think that alone can bring back the spark that was once there. but it will be a different spark but it will be there:)